Statistically Speaking...

85% of people polled said they loved the new Star Trek Reboot.
15% were in their mother's basement building JJ Abrams voodoo dolls.

90% of all people polled masturbate…
10% couldn't take the poll because they were masturbating at the time.

71% of all hippies smoked weed and bathed once a month.
29% of all hippies are dead

33% of all mothers steal from their children's Halloween stash
67% of all dads take the rest.

99% of all wives hate hearing the phrase "put the shoes to her" from their husbands.
1% are deaf.

43% of people think that being outside without a jacket you catch cold.
57% or people are not idiots

21% of voters turned out this year
79% realized a long time ago how worthless and futile the whole process is.

25% of people polled say they believe in astrology
75% of people polled believe that the other 25% should return to their home planet

100% of the people polled believers that we should build a rocket and send Miley Cyrus, Donald Trump, Ed Sheeran, Paris Hilton, Sarah Palin and the entire cast of Jersey Shore into the sun.